Welcome!

I saw that Mr. Woody recently wrote a post praising my blog and telling you all to come visit it. Well, here you are. Impressed yet? Probably not. That is because in reality there is really nothing special about this blog. It may look well managed and very sophisticated with its decorative flames and its many widgets on the sides, but in reality it is not widely read and it has only been recommended by one person. You are only looking at this because there was a hyperlink directing you here. You are sheep. Your shepherd told you to go and you went.  You gave it no thought. I could be giving you a virus right now and you would have no idea. You jumped into the pool without testing the water. Now the sharks will eat you alive. 

Duh nuh..... Duh nuh.....Duh nuh duh nuh

I’m just kidding, but that does bring up a very good point about society. You do what you’re told without thinking about what you’re doing. How many of you have ever eaten what somebody gave you? Have you ever followed somebody’s directions to get to a building? I know you have all believed most everything your teachers tell you. That’s because you trust them. Haven’t you ever watched a movie? The main theme is very repetitive: Trust no one. If you trust someone, they can drag you along a path of lies and throw you off the cliff of commitment into the pit of regret. Sound’s a lot like marriage doesn’t it?

Did you like that last metaphor? I did. I am starting to use metaphors more and more often. Metaphors allow you to compare anything you want with quite literally anything else. Then, people who read it can come up with their own ideas of what the metaphor means and you don’t have to. If they don’t know what it means, then you can just say that it is “too deep for them to comprehend”. With this method, you can say any variety of nonsense and get away with it.

To summarize, I’m not asking you to trust me. This blog is a lamp, and I am only asking you to enjoy it. In my opinion (remember, my opinion is a Palestinian chair choking in the nitrous wind) it is not nearly as great Mr. Woody said it was, but I will admit that it is pretty awesome. Feel free to leave any comments you want and I will respond to them within 3-5 business days. If you feel that it is morally wrong to comment on a page belonging to someone that you do not know, then you may comment on Mr. Woody’s page and he will relay message to me. We have our own little blog community, you see. Before you ask, you may not be a member, and we will share no details about it with an outsider.

Especially me.

As a closing thought, I would like to tell you that, like Seinfeld, this blog is about nothing, so please do not begin reading it with high expectations because your hopes and dreams will be crushed by the weight of boring ideas and non-standard writing techniques.

See "The Pilot"